Envious
by bebo9147
Summary: James doesn't know why Kendall's face pisses him off. Kendall wants to finally take control after their relationship takes off. NSFW Warning! [My contribution for the BTR Plot Adoption Forum's Emotions Challenge]
1. Chapter One - Ugly

**[ A/N: Thank you to the BTR Plot Adoption Forum for letting me participate in another challenge. This fic is my contribution for the Emotions Challenge. It was a lot of fun to write and was supposed to be a one-shot but I found myself unable to stop writing so instead of a one-shot theres 4 chapters. Thank you for reading :) ]**

James' eyes were trained on Kendall. He watched as Kendall's fingers moved from chord to chord, moving naturally along the wooden neck of the acoustic guitar. His fingers held the strings so seamlessly, making James feel relaxed and happy. Kendall started singing lowly, something he only did when he was feeling comfortable and calm. He was playing a song Gustavo had written, but the acoustics of just Kendall's smooth voice and the guitar made the song sound so much more original and heartfelt.

The two boys were sitting on some beanbags in Roque Records. They were in a studio full of instruments and many comfortable sitting surfaces; creating a very chill writing space. Their friends Carlos and Logan were nowhere to be seen. In this moment, James could only focus on how lovely Kendall and his playing sounded. It wasn't often that he could hear only Kendall's vocals and a single guitar playing. Kendall's voice was always a pleasant surprise for James. He never knew his friend could sing so well, and he assumed that was probably because it was James who did all the singing and theatrics. In this moment James couldn't help but feel like the lovesick lyrics were being sung not just to him, but for him. He was momentarily lost in the sweet serenade before the wrong chord was strung which threw Kendall off. Kendall's slender hand ran through his dirty blond hair and an irritated sigh was exhaled.

"I can never get that chord," he said with clear annoyance. James pursed his lips and looked at Kendall's fingers that were still on the note.

"You've got your middle finger in the wrong spot dude," James said as he leaned closer to Kendall. The beans inside the soft bag rustled as James moved closer to the male sitting in front of him.

"I thought you didn't play guitar?" Kendall said when he remembered James' best musical talent, aside from singing, was piano.

"I mean, I know enough to know that's the wrong fingering," he said as he gently pinched the tip of Kendall's middle finger. Touching Kendall's finger sparked an unexpected rush of emotions and feelings that made James' cheeks tint a subtle pink. He looked up and the look he shared with Kendall showed that they both felt that spark. His lingering hold of Kendall's finger felt natural. James found himself not wanting to move. This then made him feel awkward, so he just shuffled back into his beanbag and crossed his arms over his chest.

"Try that."

Kendall looked down with a doubtful face that had replaced that previous bashfulness. He cleared his throat and strummed. The chord sounded perfect, which made Kendall smile wide with excitement.

"Oh! You actually _did _know what you were talking about-" Kendall said excitedly. "Thanks dude." The way Kendall smiled had James feeling a peculiar kind of intensity in his chest. It was foreign and weird. He had seen Kendall smile and play guitar many times before but had never gotten clammy hands and a racing heart before. Kendall resumed singing and the feelings didn't falter, which irritated James. He was angry at how lovely Kendall could sing. He didn't deserve to be so talented when he didn't even want to have this dream in the first place.

Kendall finished the song then put the guitar down. "I wish Gustavo would let us write our own music…" Kendall's random statement made James roll his eyes.

"If you were talented he'd probably let you."

James' remark had Kendall sit back. He stared at his best friend of many years trying to figure out what sparked such a harsh statement.

"Dude what was that for?"

"What?"

"Why'd you say that?"

"I don't know man. Just stating the truth- back off." James stood up abruptly. Kendall stared up at his friend and sighed. Sometimes James did make random and rude outbursts that would often confuse Kendall. He stared at James and hated how he felt. It was one of those unpleasant feelings that he wished he wouldn't have to deal with. You know that kind of feeling you get where your heart speeds up and it jumps into your throat? The kind of feeling you don't usually get with your same-sex friends. It was confusing to be feeling this instead of hurting, but who could deny it? James looks hot when he's mad.

This thought had Kendall blushing deeply. He finally averted his gaze and rubbed the back of his neck in his go-to bashful tic.

"Where are you going?" Kendall asked. This irritated James because he was hoping that Kendall would at least fight him back or insult him or- or _something_. James huffed and shrugged. He was aggravated.

"Gonna get Carlos and Logan. We should probably start looking for Gustavo. They spend too much time messing around and not practicing." James seemed exasperatedly hasty, which was weird to Kendall since they had been really chill not too long ago.

"Oh- okay then…" Kendall looked down at his hands. James felt that weird pain in his chest and balled his hands into fists. No time for being confused and emotional when you should be finding your other bandmates and recording some new songs. James huffed and turned away from Kendall. A flash of how Kendall's eyes looked when James was mad made James' chest ache. The look in Kendall's eyes made James want to turn around and show him some more chords as an excuse for touching his hands. Weird thoughts like these could wait though, as there's no time to focus on stupidly confusing thoughts. He can figure it out later. He walked out of the room and could hear Kendall sigh and resume playing some chords on the guitar. He wanted to go back and just sit in that lovely moment of Kendall singing to him for a little longer, but he knew he should probably just find his other friends, so they can hurry up and head home for the day.

Later that night there was a weird tension between Kendall and James at the dinner table. The kind of tension that could be felt by everyone who was sitting and trying to enjoy their spaghetti bolognaise. Kendall was trying to figure out what had caused James to have such a weird outburst when they were simply relaxing and playing music. James looked up, making their eyes connect. There was a weird non-physical spark this time which angered James.

James slammed his fork and spoon down onto the table. "I'm trying to eat! Stop staring!"

"You're the one who's staring at me!" Kendall yelled in response. James stood up and picked up his bowl and fork.

"I'm eating in my room," James' demand had Jennifer hold her hand up and close her eyes.

"No, you're not. Sit back down and finish like the rest of us." James stared at Kendall's mother before grunting and following her order. He sat down and shoved the last mouthfuls of pasta into his mouth before he stood up again. He was irritably moody, and even James wished he knew why. He stormed into the kitchen and dumped his bowl into the sink before walking out of the apartment. Jennifer turned her attention to her son with a furrowed neatly tweezed brow.

"What's going on?" Her voice was stern and full of concern. Kendall always wondered how she was able to pull off such conflicting emotions. Maybe James picked his behaviour up from her.

"Honestly I don't even know." Kendall said with a sigh. He twirled his fork in the pasta and stared down.

"Well go sort it out when you're finished eating." Jennifer was using that same gentle yet stern tone that only a mother could use. It made Kendall mad. He took his time finishing off the food before he headed to the kitchen with his bowl. He put it on top of James' mostly-empty one and then pulled a beanie over his head.

"I'll be back soon."

"With James." His mother added.

"Yeah, yeah with James or whatever." Kendall waved off the statement before rolling his eyes. His mother sighed at the immature gestures.

James wasn't in the hallway when Kendall opened the door. This irritated him because now he must go looking around for James instead of just seeing him sulking against the nearest wall. Kendall tried sending a couple of text messages to James' phone, but he was essentially blown off. A couple were left on read before there was no response. He tried calling but it was evident James' phone had been turned off with how the phone went straight to voicemail. Kendall grunted and begun walking throughout the PalmWoods. He had a rough idea of where James might be judging by the places he frequents most.

After roughly half an hour the door to the PalmWoods gym opened. James looked up from the black and red dumbbell to meet Kendall's bored, unamused gaze. Even with something so quick and stupid, James still felt that winding blow to his chest; that weird non-physical spark that made him wish he could figure out why Kendall made him feel this way. He rolled his hazel eyes and resumed his set. The gym was empty aside from the gorgeous moping teenager sitting near a mirror. Kendall shoved his phone into his pocket and walked over to James. He sat on the ground and crossed his arms.

"What's your beef man?" Kendall asked as he cocked a dark bushy brow.

"None of your business." James huffed and tried to ignore Kendall by continuing his set. He was distracted by Kendall's presence though and had lost count a couple of reps ago.

"Well when you're being rude to me, so that _kiiiind_ of makes it my business."

"Just drop it and piss off dude." James put his dumbbell down and ran a hand through his perfect brunet hair. Kendall pursed his lips and tried to study James' features. He felt that weird feeling again while he was staring at his friend. His heart started racing and he moved his crossed arms upwards a little, he was then able to press his arms firmly to his chest. He had an irrational fear that James would be able to hear how hard his heart was pounding. It was beating so hard it felt like it was going to bust out of his ribcage.

The heart in James' chest was also thumping fast. He rubbed an open hand over his damp forehead and grunted. "What are you doing? For real?" James' voice was irritated and confused. Kendall stared.

"What do you mean?"

"I don't know man. I'm really confused. Why am I always so pissy with you? What are you doing to me?"

"Doing to _you? _You're doing it to _me!_" Kendall didn't mean to yell. He didn't mean to sound so snappy.

Silence fell between the two teens. It was the type of silence that was uncomfortably awkward… the kind you don't have with your best friend. Neither of them said a word. They kept waiting for the other to start speaking, but the silence was never interrupted.

That was until James exhaled roughly. "Why did you come here?" His voice was small, almost pathetic.

"I don't know… mum told me to come and get you… to sort things out…" Kendall answered. The tension between James and Kendall had lasted for what was probably weeks up until this point, they were able to avoid it until now though. James could feel a gross stiffness building up inside of him when he thought about how irritated he had been with Kendall lately. Kendall had never done anything directly wrong to James, he just hated the confusing ways Kendall was making him feel.

"Pick up a dumbbell and work out with me if you're not going to spot me then," James said as he leaned down to pick the weight back up. He figured working out together would be a good way to not have to think about the stupid tension and connections they were both feeling. He held it in his right hand and resumed the activity Kendall had interrupted earlier. Kendall watched James' muscles flex and relax as he moved the weight. Perspiration dripped down his skin and it made a lump grow in Kendall's throat, and another lump in his pants threatened to produce.

Kendall shook his head hard.

That was a weird thought.

Why would his best friend make him hard?

Maybe its just a build up of testosterone or something.

Kendall walked over to the rack that the other dumbbells rested on. He chose the weight below what James was using and sat on a chair next to him. He held one dumbbell in his hand and rested his elbow on his knee; mirroring the way James was sitting. Kendall had never really been one for working out or doing any kind of muscle training. The most exercise he got was during hockey practice, or whenever he got the chance to play in between studio work. James though, he was always working his muscles out. I guess pretty guys like him must keep in shape like that.

Kendall shook his head again, loosing count of his reps. Then he stared down at his feet and held onto the weight; he bit his lower lip. It's not a lie. James is really pretty. He's a pretty guy. Nothing weird about thinking that. Kendall couldn't stop trying to figure out why thinking about James being pretty felt different in this context as opposed to the many other times he's spoken about James being pretty. He wondered about what felt different. Why were things different.

James looked over at Kendall who had stopped moving the weight. He noticed that the blond was deep in thought. He wondered about what Kendall was thinking about. The silence between them now was a very thoughtful one. Kendall was trying to figure out why James is making him feel weird and James was trying to figure out why Kendall keeps pissing him off.

"Maybe its your face." James didn't mean to speak his thoughts aloud. Kendall snapped out of his thoughtful daze and looked over at his friend.

"My face?"

James blinked, only just realizing he had started to speak with words instead of thoughts. "Yeah. Your face. I don't like it." The words felt wrong, and James wanted to know what made him say it. Kendall's emerald eyes widened as he took offence to his friend's words.

"Dude what the fuck?" Kendall didn't swear often, but how could he hold back a curse when he was just insulted? James just stared at him with a blank expression.

"Yeah. Your face. Your eyes, your eyebrows. That _nose_. I'm sick of seeing it." James seemed to be satisfied with this conclusion. He was feeling weird and tense around Kendall because he was sick of seeing Kendall's ugly mug.

Kendall felt embarrassed after thinking about how pretty James was, only to be called out on his insecurities. Before his emotions took over, he tried to think rationally.

"Were you rejected or something and now you're taking it out on me?" Kendall asked, deciding he had figured everything out. James shook his head.

"No, you're just ugly and I don't want to see your face anymore." James' words were like icy bullets that blew through Kendall's heart. Kendall had no response. He put the dumbbell down and nodded before he turned and walked out of the gym.

There was a stiff heaviness that entered the room when Kendall left. James could feel his heart sinking very low. There was a depression that wrapped around him. He knew he was being harsh, but as far as he was concerned he was being truthful. It felt wrong, but he wanted it to be right. James started pulling the weight up and down, deciding to repeat his sets so that he could focus on something that wasn't Kendall's goddamn face.

Kendall and James stopped talking after they saw each other in the gym that night. They would sing stiffly together during rehearsals and ignore each other on the way home. Kendall didn't want to talk to James after everything he had said, and James wasn't interested in talking to someone who continued to affect him in weird ways.

James was laying alone in his bed staring up at the ceiling. He was finding it difficult to fall asleep. He initially blamed this difficulty on how busy today was with choreography lessons, and he figured he was still pumped. Sometimes that huge burst of adrenaline would keep the guys up for hours later than when they usually got tired. However, flashing images of Kendall's face were burnt into his memory continued appearing every time he closed his eyes. Constantly seeing Kendall's face whenever James would relax and think he was finished thinking about Kendall was starting to get annoying. James just wanted his brain to stop showing him Kendall's face. It was ugly, and he was sick of seeing it.

James had always been mesmerised by Kendall's eyes ever since they were kids. They were a gorgeous green that have these specks of gold in them. The first time he saw those eyes was at their mutual friend Danny's birthday party when they were kids. James stopped being friends with Danny that day; deciding Kendall was a cooler friend and he much preferred his company. Even Kendall ditched Danny to pursue this lifelong friendship. He grew up staring into those eyes, looking at that larger-than-average nose. He lived a very large portion of his life listening to Kendall sing, seeing him in clothes that suited him and clothes that looked horrific.

The uncalled-for trip down memory avenue had James smiling. He didn't even realise he was smiling until his cheeks begun to hurt. He rubbed his face and pressed the balls of his hands into his eyes. He grunted and wished he could just stop thinking about Kendall. He already figured it out, didn't he? He was annoyed by how ugly Kendall right?

James thought he had finally fallen into a peaceful sleep; but, a steamy dream involving him, a naked and very eager Kendall and lots of lube had him tossing and turning throughout the night. His dream was filled with hot passionate sex that he didn't realise he needed until he woke up with sticky wet underwear and an embarrassingly stiff boner.

He looked to his side and saw Carlos was still fast asleep. For the first time since moving to L.A, James was glad he could hear Carlos' obnoxious snoring. The four boys were split into two bedrooms to share. Kendall and Logan took one, while James and Carlos took the other. Jennifer and Katie took their own bedroom. He got out of bed and punched his bedsheets up, making sure to be extremely quiet so Carlos wouldn't wake up and tease him for having a wet dream. He bunched the sheets up and threw them into the washing basket before waddling to the bathroom.

James hated pissing with a boner. It was uncomfortable and sometimes it fucking hurt. He attempted waiting for his erection to naturally go down in the bathroom, but he knew that he'd be in there for hours if he waited. So, he did what most 18-year-old dudes do; he had a wank.

The shower head hissed as James turned the taps on. He waited and turned the knobs a couple of times to get the temperature just right. Once it was warm enough James stripped out of his now-dirty pyjamas and stepped into the shower. James sighed as the hot water kissed his skin. The temperature of the water only increased his morning arousal. He leaned against the shower wall and wrapped his hand around his cock. It didn't take long for James to be closing his eyes and trying his best to hold back any kind of moan or sexual sound that would give away the fact he was masturbating in the shower this morning.

James wasn't usually a very visual masturbator. He just jacked off and then he was good to go. However, this time the image of Kendall staring up at him continued to pop into his head. Every time he thought about Kendall he figured his erection would go down and he could just go on about his day as if nothing had happened, as if he didn't have a hot dream about pounding into Kendall's arse.

His dick wasn't having it though.

Every time he thought about Kendall, the way his hand moved felt a little better than whenever he tried to ignore it. Eventually James gave in and just started to masturbate without putting too much thought into what he was thinking about.

Seeing Kendall's smile when he came though… that was weird to him. He had never seen that flash before his eyes as he shot his load into the shower drain.

James felt dirty.

He had never masturbated to Kendall's ugly face before. He washed off his body then stepped out of the shower. He towelled his hair before wrapping the towel around his waist. He begun combing and styling his hair. He stared at himself in the foggy mirror.

_What a filthy boy… masturbating to the thought of your best friend… _

His mind wasn't being kind. He felt guilty. He sighed and brushed his teeth before walking out of the bathroom. He opened the door and saw Kendall standing in the kitchen with a mug in his hand.

Kendall's eyes seemed to automatically gaze down James' body. James was usually a confident dude but with Kendall's unwavering gaze he couldn't help but feel self-conscious. He kept rather quiet while he masturbated just now, yet he couldn't help but worry about if Kendall knew what he was thinking about a few moments ago.

"Morning," Kendall's voice was gruff. He looked tired, as if he had also been up all night.

"Hey…" It was the first time they had spoken since James insulted Kendall in the PalmWoods gym. Kendall was quiet for a moment before he put his cup of hot chocolate down. He was about to speak but James cut him off.

"Sorry for calling you names."

Kendall stared at his mostly naked friend. He couldn't take his eyes off James' torso. His eyes were trained on how the water droplets slowly dripped down that perfect, evenly tanned skin. He licked his lips and stared up at James.

"It's okay-"

"-No its not. I shouldn't have been so rude to you man…" The guilt in James' head went deeper than just insulting Kendall's appearance after what he had done this morning. Even the dream he had wasn't making James feel all that innocent.

Kendall was usually a confident dude. He didn't care about his appearance or materialistic things. He was all about personality and friendship. Having his looks insulted didn't usually get to him, but he wanted to know if what James said was true. He needed to know if his friend meant those words.

"Is it true though? Am I really that ugly you couldn't stand to look at me?" It was the first time James had heard Kendall speak so small. He hated himself for making Kendall feel that way.

"I don't know."

James hated himself for giving that answer. He should have lied and talked about how attractive Kendall actually is. He should have rambled about how beautiful Kendall's features actually are. He should have spoken about how much he wished he was as confident as Kendall, about how he wanted to be more like Kendall but didn't know how. There were heaps of attractive things about Kendall that aren't his face. And that's not even getting started on how handsome Kendall actually is.

Kendall looked broken from James' answer. James wish he could find the right words to fix it. He was stuck.

"Why are you telling me this now?" Kendall asked after silence had slipped between them for a couple of minutes.

"I- I don't know."

"Say more than that dude." Kendall sounded desperate. James looked up and noticed Kendall was still staring at his torso. He wrapped his arms around his waist to cover himself up.

"Why do you keep staring at me?" James asked in a snappy tone.

"Cause you're hot."

James blinked.

"Thanks?"

This was weird. It was confusing. Why was Kendall acting so weird? Why is he suddenly saying things like this? James' head hurt. He had to clean his bedsheets. That's what he should be doing instead of standing here in the kitchen half naked having confusing conversations with his best friend.

"Dude, you should go back in the bathroom." Kendall said with a chuckle. James snapped his head in Kendall's direction.

"What do you mean? I'm finished in there?"

"Uh… no you're not." Kendall sounded amused.

"What's so funny?"

"Why are you hard?"

"What-?"

"You're hard. Whys that? Is it something I said?" Kendall was weirdly flirty about this. James was confused. Why was Kendall sounding so flirty after he insulted him again?

James looked down.

Kendall wasn't joking.

He didn't even realise he had gotten hard again. Then Kendall's accusation clicked.

"Hang on- no way would someone as ugly as you turn me on. Its just hormones. Its early and I'm cold." James' excused didn't fool Kendall.

Kendall rolled his eyes and smirked. He picked up his mug and took a long sip before smacking his lips and sighing happily.

"I can't wait to tell Carlos that you got hard because I called you hot. He's gonna find that so funny after how rude you've been to me. Ooo I wonder what Logan will say…" Kendall mused. James blushed deeply and put both hands on his crotch.

"Dude its not funny- don't tell anyone." James hissed.

"I won't…"

James sighed with relief.

"But." James tensed up and stared at Kendall. Was he really going to blackmail him? No fair. James glared at Kendall mercilessly. He waited in agony for Kendall to continue. "You have to tell me the real reason why you keep insulting me. I'm not stupid James."

James stared at Kendall with disbelief.

"Can we talk about this later?" James could feel himself getting harder the more he listened to Kendall's voice. It was unfair.

"No. I wanna talk about it right now. Here. In the kitchen. While you're hard and vulnerable. James. Why do you keep being so mean to me?" Kendall was as stubborn as his sister and his mother. James was irritated and could feel that he was just desperate to be left alone. Kendall didn't look like he was going to be giving up on this anytime soon though.

**"****Uuuufughghghhghhhh" **James groaned loudly. "Dude I don't even know why I'm being so mean. You're just pissing me off and this is _NOT _helping."

Kendall leaned back and rested against the kitchen counter. He sipped his hot chocolate and looked down at James' hands.

"Why are you covering up? I've seen your dick before." Kendall was referring to hockey practice change rooms, growing up together which meant sharing baths and changing their clothes together. He hadn't seen it since they both started to go through puberty, but that didn't change the fact he had actually seen James naked many times. He's seen James' body go through all kinds of changes. But James wasn't thinking that rationally. He assumed Kendall meant something more recent. He thought Kendall meant he had seen James with his fully developed cock in action, not just referring to kids being kids.

"That's sick." James muttered.

"You've seen mine too," Kendall huffed. He finished his hot drink and put the mug in the skin before turning his attention back to James. James suddenly remembered the times he had seen Kendall naked. They were close, of course they had seen each other naked. But right now, James was horny and thinking about someone like Kendall was making him extremely embarrassed. He blushed furiously and gave his erection a squeeze to try and get it to go down. He huffed.

James didn't want Kendall to say anything to the others. He was scared about what Kendall would say. Of course, James could just deny any of the claims, but with something like this he knew he would be blushing and wouldn't make a very convincing argument.

He sighed and turned around, admitting defeat.

He needed to sort out the problem in his genitals as soon as physically possible.

"Fine, tell them whatever. Just leave me alone so I can fix this." James said with a sigh. Kendall stared at James' toned back. He wasn't smiling anymore. He was just hoping he could retrieve answer from James. Literally anything would have been better than 'I don't know'.

Kendall reached forwards and placed his hand on James' shoulder. He stepped closer and sighed. He was planning to apologise but the intense shudder from the simple touch made Kendall pull his hand away and swallow his words.

A furious red attacked James' cheeks. He almost came from Kendall placing a hand of condolence to his back. James stepped forwards and tried to wrack his brain for appropriate words and sentencing.

"I- I'm going to the bathroom." He announced. Kendall just nodded.

"Okay dude…"

The bathroom door shut, and James pressed his back to it. He locked the door and started breathing hard.

He couldn't make sense of what he was feeling. He couldn't figure out why he felt that way. Why did Kendall have that effect on him? James stared down at his full erection. He had just dealt with one of these, and now he was faced with dealing with another one. James sighed irritably.

What was Kendall doing to his head?


	2. Chapter Two - Answers

James avoided Kendall harder than he had ever avoided anyone or anything in his life. This is including girls he stood up on dates and incomplete assignments the teacher would ask him for after a long weekend.

Every time James walked past Kendall he wasn't exactly subtle about the whole avoiding him thing. James would turn around instantly and just start walking in the direction opposite to the one Kendall was coming in. James even went so far as to call Gustavo with a fake cough claiming to be too sick to go to the studio, so he could just have a few hours of not seeing Kendall.

Kendall hadn't said anything, and he didn't even plan on saying anything. James wasn't aware of this and didn't want to take the chance of saying something rude to Kendall which would then lead to Kendall saying something about what had happened the other morning. He was also simply embarrassed to face his friend after he got hard for a compliment, then almost came from a small, gentle touch.

James still couldn't figure out what it was that was making him be so nasty towards Kendall. He couldn't even figure out what it was that was making him so confused and angry. James wanted to just stop thinking for a while.

Katie was at school, Jennifer was running errands, the guys were at the studio and James was at home pretending to be sick. He didn't usually miss rehearsals and recordings, so no one really questioned him when he said he was sick. Not even Gustavo questioned it- then again, he was probably relieved to be rid of one less 'dog'.

Thinking about Kendall so much was beginning to stress James out. He deserved some one-on-one time with the game console in the living room. James sat on the offensively orange couch and played his action-packed games using the beloved platinum controller. He enjoyed vegging out for the day. He had some orange juice and a bowl of chips to his left, a speaker playing music to his right. He was in the zone; chilling out and playing games. This peace didn't last for long though.

James panicked when the door opened because he didn't think Jennifer would be back so soon. James remembered her putting chicken soup in the fridge and mentioning something about coming back in the afternoon. He looked to the door with worry. She prescribed bed rest and he knew he would be in a lot of trouble when she saw he was sitting up on the couch instead of resting. Maybe she just forgot something. He tried to think of ways to help her out or a bullshit excuse as to why he wasn't in bed.

A bigger concern came through the door.

Kendall had walked into the apartment, not his mum. Kendall put some papers on the table and slipped out of his jacket. He pulled his beanie off and tucked it into the back pocket of his skinny jeans. He walked towards the couch James was sitting on with determination in his face.

James didn't know whether he should be afraid because now Kendall had busted him for being fake sick or if he should fear the fact that he and Kendall were now alone; face to face.

The second option was much scarier.

He looked back and forth and just stood up with a drink of cold OJ in his right hand, and a platinum gaming controller in the left.

"I swear I'm sick, I was just playing games so I wasn't bored in bed-" James' excuse didn't even matter to Kendall. The blond teen rolled his eyes and closed the door behind him.

"I know you're faking it so you don't have to be around me today." Kendall said sternly. Here he goes again, being stubborn and boasting that whole know-it-all attitude the Knight family seems to share.

"I am not." James tried to force a fake cough. Kendall rolled his green eyes again.

"Cut the crap James and just confront me already. Just talk to me dude." Kendall walked over and sat on the couch.

"We are talking," James said as he moved to walk away. Kendall shook his head and pointed at the couch beside him.

"No. Sit here and have an actual conversation with me. I'm sick of feeling uncomfortable and awkward. I want some answers. No, actually, I deserve some answers." James knew there was no way out of this conversation now. He sat down next to his friend, if he was even still that, and he sipped his juice. He didn't even know what as going on himself, how was he supposed to answer Kendall's questions.

"What do you want to talk about?" James asked with boredom in his tone.

"Why do you think I'm ugly? Why do you keep avoiding me? I don't know James, where do you think we should start?" Kendall was starting to sound like an angry chick and it was starting to piss James off more than the constant thinking about Kendall thing he's been doing lately.

"I don't know what to say dude, maybe I just envy you or something." James shrugged.

"_Pffft_. James Diamond. Envying _me_? Come on. Give me a real answer this time."

James stayed silent while he tried to think. He hated Kendall's sarcasm and stubbornness. He wished he would just piss off and their friendship could just go back to the stupid banter and lame jokes and the hockey fights it used to be filled with.

"What if I do envy you? Like your strength or confidence? Your stubbornness? Your smarts? You have a lot of stuff I don't have." James said to try and change the subject.

"You're not getting out of it that easy James." Kendall wasn't buying it.

"Well what do you want to hear then?" James asked with frustration.

"Do you like me?" Kendall asked.

"…"

That unsettling silence consumed them again. James stared into his best friends' persistent eyes. Kendall was staring with determination and meaning. He knew why he was there, and he already knew the answers to whatever James was going to say. He figured it all out before James could even wrap his head around the possibility of even being attracted to Kendall.

"No." James' answer was simple and sharp enough to cut steal.

"Liar."

It was a big accusation that had James stiffen.

"Do you want me to like you?" He asked. Kendall rolled his eyes and leaned against the back of the couch.

"Doesn't matter. I know you like me. You always have. You're just too dumb to realise it." Kendall stated perceptively.

"If I liked you I would have asked you out ages ago. I know what love and attraction feels like. Don't you think I would have taken you on a date and flirted with you heaps by now?" James asked with a raised eyebrow. While he spoke, Kendall continued to move closer to him. James stopped talking when Kendall's knee was touching his own. He drank the rest of his juice and put the cup down on the floor to ignore how close Kendall was getting.

Kendall leaned closer to James. His face was merely inches away. James should have moved back. He should have moved away. He knew he should have done more than just sit there like an idiot waiting to see what was going to happen next. Kendall closed the small distance between them by pressing his lips to James' orange-flavoured ones.

James didn't move.

He sat there with Kendall's lips pressing against his own. It was quick and chaste, and the moment was gone as fast as it had arrived. Kendall pulled back and stared at James.

"If you don't like me, why didn't you pull away?" Kendall asked gently. James stared at him, trying to think of a decent argument. His brain couldn't come up with anything reasonable. He just grunted and closed his eyes, grabbing either side of Kendall's face and smashing their lips together again. He was confused and didn't know what he was thinking by doing this- the only thing James knew right now was that kissing Kendall felt like the right thing to do and he really wanted to be doing that right now.

Whatever Kendall was trying to prove didn't matter anymore. They were on a completely different subject now. James was moving his lips with Kendall's; more than happy to feel that Kendall was kissing him back. Their kiss started off with lips moving and pressing into and against each other until Kendall nipped at James' lower lip. James grunted and poked his tongue out to lick at Kendall's bottom lip. He then nibbled on the lip and pressed his tongue into Kendall's mouth; deepening the kiss.

Hearing Kendall release a faltered moan into his mouth had James hot and ready for more of… of whatever the fuck that was. He leaned closer to Kendall and moved one hand down Kendall's side, pressing his hand into Kendall's lower back. Kendall arched his back and started rubbing his tongue along the side James'. James' hand was hot and heavy on Kendall's clothed back. There was an intense heat that was passed between them as their kiss became more frenzied and desperate.

The kiss momentarily broke when Kendall moved to sit in James' lap. He straddled James' legs and pressed himself downwards. He wanted to feel James' hands everywhere on him, and James' hands didn't want to stop their roaming. Both of James' hands were now on Kendall's back while they kissed again. One hand was roaming behind Kendall's head. James' fingers separated and slipped between Kendall's blond locks while the other hand slipped down to Kendall's arse. Kendall gasped into James mouth and tilted his head back when the feeling of being groped sent pleasure up and down his spine. James' mouth missed being occupied and it automatically latched onto Kendall's exposed Adam's apple.

Kendall gasped again as James begun sucking on Kendall's neck. His tongue then slipped out and licked a line down to the nape of Kendall's neck. He begun sucking and nibbling along Kendall's collar bone before he sucked hard on the gap between Kendall's neck and shoulder. Kendall squirmed from the overload of sensations James caused. James kissed his way back up to Kendall's lips, so they could kiss hard again.

The feeling of Kendall's hips pressing downwards was one chapter of the story; but feeling Kendall's erection rub against his own was a completely different book. James couldn't help but lustfully moan against Kendall's now plump and kiss-bruised lips. This reaction made Kendall chuckle and grind himself down again onto James' crotch. Despite the four layers of clothing between their cocks yet grinding still felt so good.

There was an intense heat in their groins. They kissed hard and fast while Kendall begun to hump himself down onto James' hard cock. They moaned into each other's mouths. James held Kendall's arse cheeks in both hands and begun to rub himself upwards, eventually meeting Kendall's speed and creating a lustrous rhythm between the two of them. They were panting hard in between desperate kisses. Their make out started passionate but now were a sloppy and desperate mess of tongue, lips and teeth. They kissed hard, a need for being inside one another dominating the way they kissed. James' cock twitched fast as Kendall continued to dry hump him.

"F-fuck- Kendall this is too much-"James huffed as he tried to pull Kendall closer. The only thing he could think about was how desperately he wanted his cock to be surrounded by Kendall's insides.

"Then why don't you stop me? Just push me off." Kendall's voice was daring, yet James could tell he didn't want that to happen either. James ignored it and just reconnected their lips. He grinded himself upwards and moaned roughly against Kendall's mouth. Kendall rubbed himself down onto a particularly good spot that had James' entire body twitching. He grunted unevenly and felt warmth spread in the fabrics that blocked Kendall's cock from directly touching his own. He barely even processed the fact that he had already came because of how good it felt to have Kendall rolling his hips down onto him. James huffed and noticed Kendall begun to slow down. He slumped against James' body and breathed breathily.

"I didn't think we'd end up doing that," Kendall panted. James was still in a bit of a daze and could barley process what had happened. His hands relaxed on Kendall's hips.

"That was wild." James said with a breathless huff. Kendall chuckled and sat back.

"I need to change my pants then go back to the studio. I actually came to bring you some sheet music from Gustavo." Kendall said as he moved off James' lap. He wobbled a bit due to weak knee's after how horny James had made him.

"Wait- why didn't you just take a photo and text it?" James asked as he focused himself out of his face.

"Cause that's not as fun as coming home and giving it to you in person." Kendall said before leaving the lunge area and walking towards his bedroom.

James stared down at his hands and blinked slowly.

"Maybe I do like Kendall…" he thought aloud.

"You're looking a lot better James," Logan remarked while eating a forkful of vegetables. James stared up from his dinner plate filled with roast chicken and veggies. He looked at Logan with a raised eyebrow.

"Um- what?" He was confused about what Logan was referring to. He had been lost in deep thought about what he and Kendall had gotten up to earlier that day.

"You're looking better," Logan repeated.

"Yeah! Must be mama K's special chicken soup. That stuff makes me feel better instantly," Carlos added enthusiastically.

"Oh yeah," James nodded slowly. He was still kind of dazed while he was sorting out how he felt about things that happened earlier. "Yeah I am feeling better…" He said softly. He stared down at his plate and begun playing with a particularly thick piece of broccoli. He started using his fork to play around with it.

"Oh James, can you help me with something tonight?" Kendall asked. James looked at Kendall with a slight blush on his cheeks.

"Yeah man, what is it?" James asked before popping that little green vegetable into his mouth with some gravy.

"Just gotta' practice some guitar stuff but Logan gets annoyed when I play late at night," Kendall teased.

"I need exactly nine hours sleep dude. It's hard to sleep when you keep playing wrong," Logan interrupted before eating more of his dinner.

"Then we'll just swap rooms for the night," James said with a shrug. "Maybe we can work on your voice as well," he offered sarcastically. Kendall frowned and leaned back in his dining chair.

"I thought you boys were done with the petty fights," Jennifer interjected.

"We are, James is just a prick," Kendall spat. James' eyes widened, and he glared at Kendall.

"No, I'm not." He argued.

"You are kind of a prick," Logan, Carlos and Katie said in unison. Jennifer shot her daughter a warning glance for using coarse language, but she shrugged it off. She knew there was no point in getting involved in the current discussion, so she just let it roll while she enjoyed the first roast she had made in a while.

James rolled his eyes and finished his plate of food. "I'll give you the best lessons you'll ever get. Your ugly music will be gorgeous after a night with James Diamond." James said knowingly as he stood up to leave the table.

Everyone settled in for the night once they had finished with dinner and were done catching up on the most popular sit-com on T.V. Logan went into Carlos' room for the night, a decision he wasn't too crazy about considering Carlos was excited at the idea of having someone other than James sleeping in the room with him. James took the sheet music Kendall had brought home into Logan's bedroom and sat on the bed. He was wearing some baggy pyjama pants and a long-sleeved shirt. He sat on the bed and read the music.

A secret benefit to learning to play piano at the level James could play meant it was easy for him to pick up on sheet reading. He learnt the melody during the time it took Kendall to come into the bedroom after his shower. He looked at Kendall and held up the sheet music. "These songs are easy, are you actually struggling with this?" He asked doubtfully.

"No," Kendall said with a huff and cocky smile. "Just wanted an excuse to sleep in the same room as you." Kendall sat down next to James. "Is that okay?"

"Yeah, of course… I just… sorry about this morning…" James said with a sigh. He ran a hand through his hair and closed his eyes. "I took it way too far and if you hate me after all of that I totally get it. I have been a prick to you and then I went and made you kiss me… so unfair of me…" James sighed. Kendall rolled his eyes at James' pathetic apology.

"Do you actually think I didn't want it?" Kendall said dryly. James stared at him blankly then nodded slowly with a raised eyebrow. "You're really dumb," Kendall chuckled.

"So… you want to do that kind of stuff with me?" James needed clarification from his friend. Kendall laughed again and nodded.

"Why do you think I wanted you to come and sleep in my room? You're smarter than this dude," Kendall huffed exasperatedly. James shrugged. He started to remember everything they did that morning; how hot the kiss was, how natural it all felt. James had never connected to anyone the way he had connected with Kendall. It was a foreign and weird feeling, but it felt right, and that feeling was worth more than anything else.

James then started to remember the wet dreams he had of Kendall, then he begun remembering how much he wanted to be inside him. James cleared his throat and moved to lay down on the bed.

"So where do we go from here?" He asked dumbly.

"I don't know. I just want to do more of whatever we did today," Kendall admitted as he oved to lay down next to James. The brunet flicked the paper away from him and he watched as it floated down to the floor next to the bed. He hesitated before speaking again.

"I want more of that too."

Kendall propped himself up so that he was resting on his elbow. He looked down at James whose head looked perfect on the light blue pillow. "You sure?"

"Yeah, why wouldn't I be? It was like, the best thing I've ever felt. I want to feel more of it." James' words made Kendall's heart speed up dramatically. He was blushing deeply while staring down into James' eyes. He bit his lower lip and his eyes moved down to James' lips. James suddenly felt like he was being analysed and it made him feel self-conscious. He noticed that Kendall was the first person who made him doubt how nice his body and complexion was.

"Let me kiss you." Kendall's demand was pretty ballsy, and it made James uncharacteristically shy. Kendall was hot, and it was driving James wild. James reached towards Kendall and hooked his arms around Kendall's neck. He pulled Kendall down and pressed their lips together. They held their lips against one another's for a couple of meaningful moments before James begun to move his mouth.

Kendall couldn't deny that James was the best kisser he'd ever kissed. It was probably a result of all the girls he had been with, but Kendall didn't want to think about those whores right now. He just kissed James' sweet lips and could feel his whole body heating up. James licked at Kendall's bottom lip and it was an automatic response for him to widen his mouth to allow James' tongue to enter.

Their tongues rubbed together, and their kiss deepened. Kendall's back arched, and his chest pressed down on James; however, he wasn't like this for long. The kiss broke and Kendall gasped when James pulled Kendall on top of him. Kendall fisted James' collar and pulled him up slightly so that he could instantly resume their heavy, passionate kiss. James grunted against Kendall's mouth as his hands travelled down to Kendall's hips. Kendall rubbed down instinctively while snogging the hot teen beneath him. James' hands slipped up under Kendall's shirt and he shuddered at the touch. James' hands smoothed up the rigs of Kendall's torso and his hands roamed Kendall's soft chest. He flicked at Kendall's nipples which made Kendall shiver and release a whiney moan.

James chuckled against Kendall's mouth. "I didn't think you'd be a sensitive nipple's kind of guy," he said while his fingers teased the now erect buds. Kendall shuddered again and pressed his forehead against James'.

"I didn't think I was either," Kendall admitted. He closed his eyes and connected his and James' lips again, this time a more animalistic need taking over the way their lips and tongues moved. Heat spread Kendall's chest to the bottom of his stomach. He could feel himself hardening while he kissed James as intensely as he was. When he rolled his hips, he could feel his ass rub back onto James' own hardon. Kendall smirked and moved away from James momentarily.

He panted and slipped off the bed. "I'm going to lock the door," he said as he walked away from the horny teen sitting on his bed. James sat up and palmed at the throbbing erection in his pants. He realised he had never felt so needy before. No one had driven him into such a heated kind of horniness before and he almost hated Kendall for having that kind of control over him.

Kendall returned to the bed and James could feel both his heart and cock throbbing hard. Kendall sat down and stared into James' eyes; he noticed James' pupils were dilated and he was beginning to sweat. Kendall was getting ready to make a cocky remark about how desperate James looked; but James took him by surprise by slamming their lips back together. Kendall just closed his eyes and accepted what was happening.

James pushed Kendall down onto his back. Kendall's head was at the foot of the bed and James moved to be directly on top of him. He positioned himself in between Kendall's legs and took full control of the situation now that the door was locked, and he was suddenly feeling more confident. He kissed Kendall hard for a few moments before his lips started to attack Kendall's neck. He didn't hesitate to start sucking and biting down hard on Kendall's pale skin.

Kendall squirmed beneath James. He wrapped his arms around James and gripped the soft cotton tightly. He bit his bottom lip while James harshly marked his neck. Millions of nerves were set off sending pleasure straight down to his dick. He panted hard and tried to keep himself under control. James slipped a hand up Kendall's shirt and begun playing with his nipple while he sucked and nibbled on the skin along Kendall's collarbone. Kendall moaned softly and closed his eyes. His skin felt hot and he knew his face was flushed. He wanted to feel more of James, and James wanted to feel more of him. James' hand slipped away from Kendall's nipple and it moved further down. He pressed his hand down on Kendall's erection; causing Kendall to gasp and open his eyes.

He stared at James with wide eyes. James had never touched another dude before, but he figured it couldn't be too much different to the way he touched himself. James' hand pressed onto the plaid patterned cotton and gently massaged the protruding warmth. His hand moved delicately and with purpose as he continued to bite at the nape of Kendall's neck. Kendall's breathing became laboured and uneven as James' hand rubbed his hard cock through his pants. The palming was making Kendall heat up and he hooked a loose arm around the back of James' neck. He huffed and closed his eyes, enjoying how nice James' large hand felt.

Another gasp emitted from Kendall when James' hand slipped into his pants. The pleasant surprise of James' hand brushing over the sensitive skin made Kendall arch his back and shiver. He bit his bottom lip when a moan threatened to slip.

"Hey- you know you don't have to do that right?" Kendall said nervously. James ignored these words by wrapping his hand around the throbbing erection in his friends' pants. Kendall gasped again and stared into James' eyes. James put his thumb on the head of Kendall's cock and started smearing the precum around the tip. He smirked and stared back down into Kendall's eyes.

"You seem pretty excited. Do you want me to stop?" James suddenly seemed so cocky and confident with his words and movements. It made Kendall melt. He shook his head and tugged James closer to him.

"Just touch me more," Kendall's cheeks were bright red. James smirked and leaned down to close the gap between their lips. He begun to slowly kiss at Kendall's swollen mouth. It started off in gentle, passionate movements before becoming hot and wild. James found himself kissing Kendall harder than he had ever kissed anyone in his life. He started to gently rub his hand up and down Kendall's boner. He could feel that it was a lot different to how his own dick felt, and he was surprised by how much he enjoyed the feeling of touching such a hot section of Kendall's skin. His wrist slowly moved up and down and he sighed against Kendall's moving lips. It was weirdly satisfying to be touching Kendall like this.

James squeezed down slightly; making Kendall release a pleasured whine. Kendall tilted his head to the side as embarrassment ran wild in his body. James smirked and gave another gentle squeeze that sent a wicked rage of pleasure coursing through Kendall's veins. Kendall shuddered and tilted his head back. James smeared Kendall's precum up and down the blond's member as a very loose way of lubricating him. James; hand was sliding with more ease now as he jerked Kendall off. Kendall stared at James with half lidded eyes. He wanted- no- he _needed _more.

"James…" He whined, and somehow James knew exactly what he meant. James sat up and pulled his hand out of Kendall's pants.

"Do you have anything?" James asked. He wasn't exactly a virgin or anything, so he knew what to do and the kinds of things he would need. However, he wasn't entirely sure how to do things with a man. And now that he thought about it, Kendall had never been with a man either. Not to James' knowledge anyway.

"Wait- how far do you want this to go?" James quickly asked. He sat back and stared at Kendall with worry. Kendall sat up and put his hands over the raging boner threatening to explode out of his pants. All Kendall and his dick wanted was to James to shut up and keep touching him now that he had tasted a little bit of what James' magical hands could do.

"As far as you're willing I guess," Kendall said with a shrug. James put a hand on Kendall's calf. He knew he had to be serious despite how his dick was practically screaming for relief at this point.

"No be more specific. What do you want? What do you want _me _to do to you? Do you want to go further than this? Should we just mess around or? Or should we…?" James was confident with asking most of these questions, but trying to ask his best friend if he wanted to have full on sex? James couldn't figure out why he was so nervous and why he was embarrassed and blushing at the thought. Is it because he's known Kendall for such a long time? Is it because it's his first time with a dude?

Is it because it's with Kendall?

James blushed deeper and gave Kendall's calf a squeeze. He stared into his friends' green eyes with comforting concern. Kendall hesitated before nodding.

"I wouldn't mind going all the way…" Kendall said with deep red cheeks and an averted gaze. James frowned and slouched his back.

"Wouldn't mind? If you don't want to go any further, it's okay…" James could feel his boner going down with the fear of how unsure Kendall was sounding.

Kendall leaned forwards and grabbed James' hands. He looked at James with absolute certainty. "I want to do it with you James." His words made James' cock spring straight back to life. "I'm just nervous cause I've never done it with a dude, and I'm worried its going to hurt." James assumed Kendall was talking about the pain of being fucked in the ass.

"I don't know, they make it look pretty easy in porn," James said with a shrug.

"You've watched gay porn?" Kendall asked with a slight smirk and a raised eyebrow.

"You haven't?" James huffed.

"Nah I haven't yet. I only watch dudes jacking off," Kendall admitted. James didn't even have time to focus on that statement because he was trying to think of his favourite gay porn star. It was a dude he had discovered by accident and he couldn't help but find the whole situation hot. He was usually the kind of teenager who enjoyed watching big titty girls getting fucked by buff dudes, but while jacking off one day a gay porn ad under the video just seemed more interesting. During the times he watched it he assumed he was enjoying it because it didn't seem fake. There was always something realer about watching twink porn than there was about the girls who fake orgasmed on a guy's dick. Simple curiosity kept him there, but James swears he was never attracted to it.

"Hang on," James leaned to the side and grabbed his phone off the floor beside the bed. He sat back up and started typing away in an incognito browser. Kendall leaned forwards and watched with curiosity as James opened what must be his favourite porn-site. Kendall was expecting something he had at least heard people talking about, but he noticed the website was unfamiliar to him. Heaps of very aesthetic porno's full of twink's came up. It looked like the site was dedicated to twink porn. Kendall blushed while he watched James type in a name.

"I love this dudes' stuff," James started as he opened up one video. "I've always wanted to do something kind of like this…" The video started, and James turned his phone's volume down. The video buffered for a moment before loading and playing. It opened with a guy who looked like a twink. A brunet with black glasses and a lion tattoo on his chest. He moved a smaller looking twink over to a couch and started playing with his body. Soon enough he had the twink bending over the couch with his ass in the air and was fucking him hard. He held the teenaged looking boy up by his biceps. He then twisted the blond boys' arms behind his back and held him up while plunging deep into his ass. Eventually the larger twink turned the other around so that he could od him on a different angle.

Kendall noticed his cock was throbbing and itching for relief the more the video progressed. The guys on James' phone looked really into whatever was going on. Kendall watched the faces and sounds the blond twink was making and he couldn't help but wish it was him making those noises. He imagined James fucking him like that and he went red from his cheekbones down to his chest. Kendall grabbed James' phone and locked the screen. He put the phone on the bedside table and blushed even deeper as he stood up. James watched him with confusion.

"What are you doing?" James asked as he reached for his phone.

"I want to try what they were doing," Kendall said as he pulled his shirt up over his head. James looked at Kendall's body and noticed that he was flushed from the head down to his chest. James bit his lip and wiggled over to the end of the bed.

"You sure? Which one do you wanna be? Top or bottom?" James asked. Kendall shrugged and held James' head in his hands. He closed his eyes then gave James' lips a chaste kiss.

"You're asking too many questions. Just fuck me already." James shuddered at Kendall's words, but nodded and sat closer to the end of the bed.

"Do you have any lube or condoms?" He asked. Kendall froze for a moment. "Um… I think I might have one… definitely have some leftover lube somewhere…"

"Okay… hang on, I've got some in my room," James stood up. "Make sure you're naked and ready when I get back," James smirked and tucked his dick into his waistband in case anyone saw him. Kendall nodded and moved back into the bed. James unlocked the door and very quietly crept over to his bedroom. He slowly opened the door and thanked god when he saw Logan passed out on his bed. Carlos was also asleep. James was very careful as he quietly manoeuvred throughout the room. He held his breath while going to his bed. He crouched down and pulled a small box out from under the bed. He pulled out a condom and some lube he had. James was a lady's man that loved sex, so of course he had these kinds of things under his bed. He only had two condoms left though so he made a mental note to get more. Carlos' snoring was annoying but oddly comforting; especially when sneaking around a quiet room.

James very gently closed the door behind him before heading back to Kendall and Logan's bedroom. He closed and locked the door before turning to look at Kendall's bed. His face instantly turned red and his cock twitched when he saw a naked Kendall sitting on the bed.

"You told me to get ready," Kendall said when James had spent a couple minutes longer than necessary staring at him from the door. James swallowed thickly before walking over to the bed with his two condoms and his small bottle of water-based lubricant. He knew that water-based went well with all kinds of products and toys ad objects, but he wasn't entirely sure about if it was alright with anal. He assumed it would be fine, Afterall, it was better than nothing.

"Well, are you ready?" James asked as he took off his own shirt. Kendall stared as the perfect skin was revealed. To Kendall it felt like James was taking his shirt off at a very teasingly agonizingly slow pace. He bit his bottom lip. Kendall envied how nice James' body was, but he was so grateful James was going to let him touch it.

James moved back onto the bed and placed himself at Kendall's feet. Kendall's legs were squeezed shut while his hand covered his erection. "You going to open up?" James asked with a cheeky smirk. Kendall didn't even realise he was suddenly shy about James seeing his whole body. He shyly looked to the side as he opened his legs. James bit his lower lip and shuffled forwards so that he was now in between Kendall's legs. He looked down.

"Move your hand. I want to see." James said in a soft voice. The lights were on which made Kendall feel extremely self-conscious about what James would think of his body. He closed his eyes and thought about how he had actually been wanting this for a while now. Kendall hesitated for a moment longer. He convinced himself that this was fine and that there was no need to be scared. He oved his hands out of the way and looked up at James. His cock flopped up against is lower abdomen and he stared at James with a needy expression. James could feel his own cock throb at the mere sight of Kendall's scrawny body.

"And you're sure this okay?" James asked as he popped open the bottle of lube. Kendall nodded. He was beginning to feel shy, so he wasn't as talkative as he had been earlier. James nodded and knelt closer to Kendall's body. He had once been with a girl who was very particular about being fingered before sex, and it was a habit that many were grateful for. James poured lube over the index and middle finger of his right hand. He held the bottle over Kendall's privates and squeezed the bottle gently. Kendall gasped as the cool liquid touched his balls and ran down his perineum.

"W-what are you doing? Aren't you just going to fuck?" Kendall asked breathlessly.

"I gotta' prepare you first," James said as he rubbed his finger around Kendall's twitching hole. Kendall looked down with cheeks redder than a tomato.

"Why are you doing that?" Kendall was suddenly worried that James had been with men before. James shrugged.

"I don't know, I just feel like I'm supposed to," James said as he pressed the tip of his finger into Kendall's hole. Kendall gasped as the nerves around his anus tingled with pleasure. Kendall stared down at how close James was to him.

James' middle finger begun to press deeper into Kendall. The blond tensed at the feeling, making James grunt. He was tight. "Relax, I don't want to hurt you…" James said gently. Kendall exhaled slowly, and James could feel Kendall's muscles relaxing around his finger. He pressed in until his finger was coated with Kendall's asshole.

"You haven't had anything in here before have you?" James asked with a smirk. Kendall blushed impossibly deeper, which was enough of an answer for James. He curled his finger, sending millions of pleasured sparks throughout Kendall's body. Not only did James notice a different texture of this area inside Kendall, but he saw the way Kendall reacted when he rubbed his finger against it. He started to slowly rub his finger against this spot some more; causing Kendall's toes to curl.

James' finger was initially uncomfortable for Kendall. It tickled, and it was something he wasn't used to. However, the more time it spent inside him, the more he wanted to feel of it. Kendall stared at James and something inside James knew Kendall wanted to feel more. James leaned down and connected their lips. He kissed Kendall gently while he started moving more of his finger. Kendall shivered and wrapped both arms around James' upper body. James' skin felt hot and perfect and it was making Kendall want to feel him more.

Kendall sucked in a quick and deep breath of air when he felt his hole being stretched. James had added another finger and Kendall could really feel it now. He hissed slightly and hid his face in the nape of James' neck.

"Move slower…" Kendall huffed. James nodded and started to slowly wriggle his fingers. He curled and uncurled the fingers, making sure he was playing with Kendall as carefully as he could.

Once James could comfortably fit three fingers inside Kendall he pulled away altogether. Kendall's hole had tried to suck James back in but was unsuccessful. James moved to stand on the floor next to the bed. Kendall just sat there dazed and leaking precum from his cock. James opened one of the condom packets and pulled his pants down.

Kendall's eyes instantly focused on James' cock that sprung out of his pants. James' cock was intimidating compared to Kendall's. It was thicker and a lot cleaner considering he was circumcised, and Kendall was not. He licked his lips when he felt a strange urge to taste it. James looked down at his own cock and pulled the condom over it. He shivered at the feeling of giving his cock a tiny touch. He didn't know if he would be able to last very long considering he was pretty riled up from Kendall's sexy reactions to being fingered.

James then pat the edge of the bed as a signal for Kendall to move. Kendall understood and moved himself, so he was at the edge of the bed. He pulled a pillow under his head and looked up at James. Even though he had never done anything like this before, James had a feeling that he naturally knew what he was doing. Now that the condom was on him and Kendall was in front of him, he knew what would happen next and it had him feeling embarrassed and shy. He suppressed these feelings though because he was way too horny to think about that kind of stuff right now.

"Put your legs up," James said as he tapped his shoulders. Kendall's face somehow got redder as he raised his legs and rested them on his shoulders. James grabbed Kendall's hips and pulled him closer to the end of the bed. Kendall didn't realise that it felt so good to be controlled like that. James held onto Kendall's hips and raised them slightly. He reached over to the head of Kendall's bed and grabbed another pillow. He pushed it under Kendall's hips and checked the distance between his cock and Kendall's hole. Not that Kendall was propped up a bit he knew it would all line up perfectly.

James was going to ask Kendall if he was ready for more; but the lustrous need in Kendall's eyes and the pumping of blood through James' own cock said enough. James moved his right hand down and rubbed his own cock which made him sigh and relax. He then lined his dick up with Kendall's hole before slowly pushing the head in. He held onto Kendall's legs with both hands and begun to slowly push deeper.

Kendall was staring up at James. He didn't think anyone could ever be sexy enough to set his body on fire the way James was right now. He felt like he was burning to a crisp just because James was getting ready to fuck him. He felt James' knob poke at his hole and it made him bite hard onto his lip. He closed his eyes as James started to push in.

He gasped and released a pained whine.

It was a lot different to fingers. Yeah, fingers were a little uncomfortable, but they were easy to get used to and felt pretty nice. James' dick though… that made Kendall's hole burn, and not in a good way. Tears filled Kendall's eyes as James continued to press in.

"S-stop for a sec-" Kendall managed to gasp out. James opened his eyes and looked at Kendall. He noticed Kendall looked like he was in pain; his face and chest were flushed a crimson red and he was sweating hard. Kendall was almost crying, and his face was scrunched up unpleasantly. James stilled his hips, one third of his cock still inside Kendall.

"Are you okay?" He asked in panic. Kendall nodded and breathed slowly.

"Yeah just… go a bit slower…" Kendall said breathlessly. James nodded and waited a moment before pulling his hips back. He rubbed his hands up and down Kendall's legs to try and soothe him before slowly pushing back in again. Kendall's tight hole squeezed in an almost unpleasantly tight way before Kendall started to relax. James moaned gently as he pushed deeper into Kendall.

The tip of James' cock brushed past that one spot that had Kendall squirming earlier. Kendall moaned and arched his back. "O-oh- fuck- do that again," he panted. James wasn't entirely sure what he did, so he pulled his hips back and tried again. He pressed deep into Kendall and rolled his hips; making Kendall release an unsteady moan. James found Kendall's noises unbelievably hot. This on top of how awesome it felt for Kendall's muscles to be clenching and relaxing around James' cock was enough to drive him insane.

James started moving a little faster now that Kendall seemed more comfortable. Nonstop pleasure wrapped around James' cock as he moved himself in and out of Kendall. He didn't even have time to try turning Kendall over like that guy in the porno did. He just started snapping his hips back and forth as pleasure dictated the way he moved in and out of his friend. He grunted and stopped focusing on Kendall and could feel himself getting closer and closer.

The sound of skin slapping, pleasured grunts and moans begun to fill the room. Kendall and James moaned together as they pleasured each other. James moved one hand down to wrap it around Kendall's cock; Kendall's back arched, and he had to cover his mouth when he almost cried out in pleasure. The feeling of James rubbing his cock while also slamming hard against his prostate was enough to almost make him jizz right then and there.

There was a pleasured itch inside James' cock and Kendall's hole was scratching it perfectly. He felt warmth building up in his stomach. James' balls tightened, and he could feel himself getting too close. He held Kendall tightly and couldn't hold back anymore. His body shuddered as his orgasm rocked through his body.

James came into the condom and couldn't stop the waves of nonstop pleasure from rolling through his body. He closed his eyes tightly as his jaw hung slack. He moaned unevenly while he came hard inside the condom that was inside of Kendall. He slowed his movements and whispered Kendall's name a couple of times before pulling out.

Kendall whimpered when James pulled out of him. He looked down and realised he hadn't even noticed he came hard. His torso was covered in cum and he felt a post-orgasm buzz. Kendall flopped to the side and breathed heavily. His ass was burning with pain, yet he felt more than satisfied. James begun to clean himself up before he laid down beside Kendall. Their legs were dangling off the edge of the bed and silence fell between them.

"That was the best sex I've ever had," James huffed. He knew this because he had cum after barley ten minutes. James was well known amongst women for amazing stamina. That stamina mostly came from the fact it took him ages to cum with those women. With Kendall though, he was having a really difficult time holding off.

Kendall hummed in agreement. "We should do it again," Kendall suggested tiredly. James nodded.

"Yeah, we should…"


	3. Chapter Three - Envy

After the first time Kendall and James had sex, it wouldn't stop. They became addicted to feeling each other and being with one another. They would wait until everyone had gone to sleep just so they could be together. There were heaps of memories of James shoving Kendall up against walls as soon as they were alone. Hot make outs that led to blow jobs, hangouts that led to fucking, simple kisses that ended with grinding. Simply being left alone together brought out a burning rage they didn't realise had been there the whole time. It was even starting to get difficult for them to be constantly hiding hickeys. They had to go and buy their own concealers after Jennifer started getting suspicious when hers begun to go missing.

Everyone had gone to bed that night. Everyone except for Kendall and James. James had Kendall pinned down to the couch and was kissing him as hard as physically possible for them. They had learnt to stay as quiet as possible so that no one would wake up. James was licking and nipping at Kendall's bottom lip.

Kendall opened his mouth and James instantly poked his tongue in. There kiss was passion heavy and dripping with a need for sex. Kendall rolled his hips upwards and James matched this by rolling his own downwards. He moaned gently into Kendall's mouth and kissed him impossibly harder.

James then started fiddling with the string on Kendall's pyjama pants. Kendall grabbed James' hands and broke the kiss.

"Not out here… we might get caught…" Kendall huffed.

"Then where should we go? I need to be in you right now," James said desperately. He was talking more with his cock than his actual brain. Kendall had to think for a moment.

"We'll go to your room and be really quiet. Nothing wakes Carlos up." Kendall stated. James nodded in agreement and stood up.

"Yeah that's true," he agreed. James walked over to the hallway with Kendall following right behind him. They very quietly went into the bedroom and over to James' bed.

The room was dark, but by this point in their relationship they didn't need to see each other's bodies anymore. James practically knew Kendall's body better than he knew his own by now. Kendall got into the bed first so that his body was closer to the wall; this meant that on the odd chance Carlos was to wake up he would see only James at first. James got in beside Kendall and pulled the bedsheets up over their bodies. James wrapped his arms around Kendall and pulled him in to continue their kisses from moments earlier on the couch.

Kendall and James kissed with deep passion. They tried their best to stay quiet as their hands begun roaming up and down each other's shirts and bodies. James held a fistful of Kendall's hair and forced his head to tilt back so that he could start sucking at Kendall's neck. Kendall was biting hard on his lip so that he wouldn't make the slightest noise. Kendall trembled and rolled his hips towards James. He reached down and pulled his pants off under the sheets. While he did this, James rolled over to grab a condom and some lube from his bedside table. They had reached a point now where they automatically knew what to do with each other. Kendall begun fingering his own hole while James pulled the condom over his erection.

James reached down to grab at Kendall's asscheek. He sighed contently as he massaged the soft cheek. He rubbed it and Kendall shivered with need. He then moved onto James' lap and pulled the bedsheets up over his shoulders. James stared up, barley making out Kendall's features in the dark. He put his left hand on Kendall's hip then held onto his cock with the other hand.

Kendall raised his hips and James begun position his dick. Kendall's hole moved around with James' dick as they tried to find the good entry spot. Kendall sighed deeply when he felt James' cock grind against his hole. James held his dick still and Kendall slowly lowered himself down onto the hard member beneath him. Kendall bent forwards and put his hands-on James' chest for support. He lowered himself down inch by inch until James was balls-deep inside him.

Large shudders coursed through Kendall's body. James had to hold his hand over Kendall's mouth to try and muffle the constant huffing and panting that he was emitting. Kendall's eyes watered at pleasure begun taking control.

Many nights were like these. Where they would sneak into each other's beds and have sex. Nights filled of their connected bodies and blocked moans. They were very much addicted to the feelings they gave each other.

Kendall was walking down a hall at Roque Records when he was suddenly pulled into a room. He was going to yell in fear but a strong hand covering his mouth muffled the noise. He opened his eyes wide and noticed he was in a dark room. He pushed himself away from the man who was holding him.

He wasn't even surprised to me staring at James.

"You could've just asked me to come in," Kendall said as he straightened out his shirt. James turned on the cupboard light. "You probably would've walked off though." James wasn't wrong with that. They were in the small cupboard space that had once been cleared out to create a makeshift 'classroom'. Kendall sighed and sat down on one of the desks.

"So what do you want?" Kendall asked as if he didn't already know. James answered by moving between Kendall's legs and pulling Kendall close to him. He begun kissing Kendall deeply; his hands splashing out over the small of Kendall's now arching back. His hands roamed over Kendall's plaid shirt and he kissed Kendall deeply. His lips moved to Kendall's neck and he begun to kiss his way downwards. He grabbed a chair from beside the desk and pulled it over so he could sit in front of Kendall. James pushed Kendall's legs apart and shuffled closer. His lips kissed over Kendall's shirt and he palmed the outside of Kendall's jeans.

"Someone could walk in y'know…" Kendall said whilst not even putting up a fight to move James off of him. James smirked and unzipped Kendall's pants with one hand. He then moved the other up to fiddle with the button.

"Doesn't that make it more thrilling though?" James smirked as he undid Kendall's jeans. James leaned closer to Kendall and started pressing open-mouthed kisses to his crotch. Kendall was barley hard yet but James being so close was soon going to change that.

Kendall felt as though his dick was tired. James seemed to be constantly horny and ready to fuck. He'd always pull Kendall aside and have his way with him, and at first Kendall was just as enthusiastic. But he was simply just tired now. He looked down at James and the lewd expression made Kendall's cock twitch.

Maybe he wasn't as tired as he thought he was.

He watched intensely as James pulled his cock out. James spat onto his palm and started rubbing his hand up and down Kendall's dick. His firm fingers wrapped around the semi-hard member and begun working. Kendall has to cover his mouth when James begun to touch him in the way he enjoyed being touched. Kendall shuddered and arched forwards; his hands automatically grabbing James' head. He bit his lip and tried to not move too much.

Once Kendall was fully erect, James moved to be as close as he physically could be to Kendall. He leaned forwards and gently parted his lips. He pressed delicate kisses along Kendall's shaft and closed his eyes. He kissed up and down the sides of it before wrapping his lips around the knob. His thumb pulled Kendall's foreskin down to expose more sensitive areas. James' tongue started to dip and tease around the places he knew drove Kendall crazy.

His tongue rubbed against Kendall's urethra. Kendall gasped and held onto James' hair, which was surprising to hear James not complain about his hair being messed up. Kendall closed his eyes and struggled to hold back moans. James then started pressing his mouth further down and he begun to lightly suck on Kendall's cock.

Kendall was trying his best to hold back moans but he lost the battle by whimpering and shivering. James grabbed the bottom of Kendall's shirt and pushed it upwards. He bunches up the shirt and forced it into Kendall's mouth as a quick gag. Kendall bit down and tried to watch how sexy James looked. He was breathing heavily and ruggedly against the cloth that was drying his mouth out. His cheeks and chest felt hot and he knew he was sweating. His perspiration being a result of both the heat he and James shares and the lack of airflow in the closet space.

James breathed heavily through his nostrils while he moved his mouth up and down Kendall's cock. His hands worked the other sections his mouth could not reach. Kendall fried into the shirt and squeezed James' head.

"Ummph clopff-" Kendall's words were muffled by his shirt, yet James understood him perfectly. He pulled back and smacked his lips. The pip made Kendall blush. He opened his mouth and his shirt dropped out. "Haaaah- yeah I- I was pretty close…" Kendall huffed.

"I know," James said with a lick of his lips. Kendall leaked precum and was suddenly craving the warmth of James' insides. James stood up and pushed the chair off to the side, and he begun unzipping his pants. He pushed on Kendall's chest as a way of getting Kendall to lay down. Kendall fought against it though and he stayed sitting up.

"Let me fuck you for once," he huffed. James shook his head.

"Not ready, we'll just do it like normal for now," James avoided the idea of swapping again. He pushed Kendall down onto the table. The blond laid back and stared up at James. He was too horny focus on how much he wished they'd switch positions and he just needed an orgasm now that James has riled him up.

James' hands smoothed over Kendall's torso; deliberately avoiding Kendall's cock as he did so. He pulled Kendall's pants down and smirked. He licked his lips and kept Kendall's pants around his knees. He held Kendall's legs up and put both of them over one shoulder. James spat on his finger then poked it fully into Kendall's ass. Kendall shuddered and closed his eyes. They had been fucking a lot lately but this felt raw and intense. James fingered Kendall's hole until the other teen felt satisfied with how loose he had gotten.

Happy with the idea of his cock fitting comfortably, James removed his fingers and spat on his hand again. He rubbed his spit over his cock and gave his erection a couple of strokes before lining up with Kendall's ass. He released an unsteady moan and started pressing in slowly. Kendall's breath hitches at the stretch and he bit his lip.

James started pressing in deeper until Kendall's warmth surrounded him from prick to balls. He shuddered and held onto Kendall's legs. Having him positioned like this made a tighter squeeze than usual and it made James almost cum immediately.

His hips begun to move forwards and backwards. He shivered and moaned as he moved more and more. James sighed and closed his eyes as pleasure crept up and down his body. "Haaah Kendall… you feel so fucking good.." they didn't talk much during sex but these words made Kendall shiver and moan.

Footsteps were heard outside the cupboard and James froze; his dick still buried in Kendall's ass. The footsteps stopped right outside the cupboard and they tried to stay as quiet as possible.

After a few agonising moment the footsteps continued on down the hallway. Kendall and James both breathed a heavy sigh of relief. They had been holding their breaths and trying to calm their twitching penis' and thumping hearts. James resumed building his rhythm back up as soon as he got the chance. He sighed and closed his eyes; enjoying every ridged and smooth feeling inside of Kendall's warmth.

Kendall had to cover his mouth when James pressed hard down into his prostate. He cried and shivered and tried to not be too loud. The heat in the cupboard made everything feel more raw and intense. Janes arched over Kendall while he fucked into him; perspiration dripping down his face and falling onto Kendall's body. Kendall has beads of sweat beginning to pool into any crevice on him.

Having layers of clothes on didn't help too much either. James released a couple of grunts of Kendall's name and started smacking his hips back and forth.

Kendall's prostate was loving the abuse it was receiving. Kendall's back arched down and James' grip on Kendall's legs tightened. He fucked Kendall hard onto the table before he pulled out. Kendall was dazed and confused before there was a loud thud on the table. James has flipped Kendall over. He pulled Kendall up so he was on all fours. Kendall's arms relaxed and his chest pressed into the table while he held his ass in the air. James pulled Kendall's pants off then have Kendall's pale ass a couple of spanks. James admired the handprint he left on the milky skin before he grabbed Kendall's asscheeks hard with both hands. He smirked at how swollen Kendall's hole looked. It gasped and stitched and James knew he needed to be inside him again. James pulled Kendall's ass down to the perfect height he would need. His thumb pushed Kendall's asscheeks apart and he leaned down and spat on Kendall's hole.

James then lined his cock back up and it didn't take long for him to be pushing himself back inside his friend again. James pushed himself in deep; making Kendall's back arch and forcing out a loud gasp. Somehow James felt thicker and more aggressive inside Kendall and it made the blond feel weak. James' fingertips dig into Kendall's hips as he held him up and begun fucking faster rather than harder. The friction and heat they shared was bringing James closer and closer. He hunched over Kendall and continued grinding against Kendall's insides.

Kendall felt drool drip from his mouth and he closed his eyes. His brows furrowed as he moaned and panted. He held onto the edge of the table and tried to not make any noises that would be loud enough to draw in anyone's attention to this space. He shuddered and released an uneven cry.

"M-more James- please- go deeper-" he whined. James' cheeks flushed a bright red at Kendall's request. He suddenly wished they were fully naked and alone in a bed somewhere so he could fully enjoy this whole experience. He wanted to please Kendall more though. He held on tight and started slamming as hard as he could into Kendall's ass. His balls slapped against Kendall's bare skin. There was some slight tugging from the lack of lube but the enthusiasm of this hard fuck was making them moan and wish for more. James tried to fuck as deeply as he could just so he could hear Kendall's helpless whimpers some more.

James then grabbed a fistful of Kendall's hair; forcing his head up and his back to arch more. Kendall's ass looked more than sexy and gorgeous on this angle. James stared down and watched as he fucked himself into the guy beneath him. His cock twitched and he closed his eyes.

He couldn't help but cum into Kendall's ass. He forgot they weren't wearing protection. He shivered and moaned as his twitching cock released its seed. James ducked his orgasm out. He held Kendall impossibly tighter while he fucked this cum out. He sighed and slowed his rocking hips before releasing Kendall's hair. He slowly pulled himself out of the blond and grabbed the chair. He took a seat. His shirt was drenched in sweat and his cock had jizz smeared all over it. He sighed and slumped back.

Kendall was laying in a mess of cum on the school desk. He breathed slowly to try and recollect himself. He slowly sat up and felt James' cum squelching in his ass. He sat up slowly and stared down at his own cum that was covering the area of the table his dick was near. He blushed and sat up with a scrunched face. His ass felt gooey and uncomfortable. He reached down and poked at his hole.

"You came in me? Where was the condom?" Kendall asked with a glare.

"I forgot to put it on… I was just really horny," James guiltily admitted. Kendall huffed. "Can you grab me some tissues or something?" Kendall asked with a blush. James nodded and looked around. The storeroom didn't seem to have anything.

"I need to wipe my dick but there's no tissues in here…" James frowned. Kendall sighed and unbuttoned his T-shirt. He pulled off his undershirt then buttoned up the plaid shirt he was wearing. He reached down and cleaned off his hole and dick as best as he could. He then wiped his semen off the table before handing James the now cumrag T-shirt. James folded it so he wasn't touching cum and wiped his cock off.

"Go tell Gustavo I'm not feeling to good and that I need to go home.." Kendall said as he shuffled off the end of the table.

"You okay?" James asked as he stood up and pulled his pants a bit. He rebuttoned his jeans and zipped them up.

"Yeah I'm fine but my ass isn't. I need a shower," Kendall huffed. He stood up but his legs wobbled and his knees gave in. He had to quickly catch himself on the table. "I'll need a second tho. At least grab me some water.."

"Yeah good idea…" James said before quickly ducking out of the storage room/classroom.

Kendall huffed and slouched. He crossed his arms and sat back on the table. He really did love spending this kind of time with James. It always felt really good. It's just.. it's not fair that James is the only one who gets to top. There was a gross feeling in Kendall's chest. It was a feeling he had become familiar with, and it was also a feeling that seemed to only be associated with James.

He remembered feeling like this back in Minnesota. When James would get all the chicks and would somehow do well in his studies. When James would play better hockey games than him. It was this gross feeling that was a constant need of wanting to be him. Like a more humble jealousy.

The words clicked in Kendall's mind.

He had always been envious of something James did or had. He envied how rich James' parents were, even in their divorce they still had heaps of money. He envied how gorgeous James is and how stupidly clever he can be. He was talented and beautiful, so much to love.

So much to envy.

Kendall grunted. He had gotten over those petty envious feelings already. He was fine with who he was and knew he didn't need to compare himself to James, especially after seeing how envious James had been of Kendall's features. That didn't stop him from feeling some kind of envy right now though.

It took him a moment, but Kendall figured it out. He was currently envious that James got to do all of the inserting and he didn't.

Kendall snorted a quick little laugh at how redivision's his thoughts were.

He was envious of the fact James topped. He wanted to laugh it off, but it was an insecurity now. He had always imagined himself being the one to fuck James, but ever since they started to have regular sex it had only ever been James fucking him. Kendall suddenly felt inadequate.

Maybe James just isn't the kind of guy who likes it in the ass… or maybe he doesn't see Kendall as a good enough top? Kendall rubbed his head and tried to shake off these thoughts. He wants to rip next time. Just need to find a good time to do it. Hopefully they can comfortably do it somewhere that's not secret like this. Kendall was sick of feeling this envy. Something needed to be done.

Kendall looked up with fear when the door opened. He sighed with relief when James stepped back in with two bottles of water, some absorbent wipes and a plastic bag. "Put your shirt in here," he said as he put the bag on the table. Kendall nodded and followed the instructions. James then handed Kendall a bottle of water and the paper towels before leaning against the door and sipping his own water.

"Breaks almost over and they're looking for us," James said. He still found it weird that one second with Kendall either felt shorter or longer depending on the circumstances. All he knew was that time with Kendall always felt different to how it actually flows.

"Oh cool, we should head back then," Kendall said before he cleaned himself up some more. He downed half the bottle of water before slowly trying to stand again. He made himself look more presentable with James help. The two of them tidied up some more before they walked out of the small room together. Kendall couldn't stop thinking about the thoughts that crossed his mind before James had come back in.

He felt weird in his chest, but he knew he'd find a way to get what he wanted.

Turned out that weekend was the perfect time to try topping James.

Katie had a birthday party that needed attending, and Jennifer was obligated to take her. Logan has a date with Camille and needed Carlos' assistance. Kendall remembered him going on about some kind of fairy-tale extravaganza that needed an extra hand.

This meant that Kendall and James has at least a couple of hours to themselves.

James was in Kendall and Logan's shared room. He stood in front of Logan and pouted in thought. He rubbed his chin before shaking his head. "Not princely enough." He muttered.

Kendall opened the door and saw James adjusting Logan's collar. He was in a slightly oversized white tuxedo with black accents. It was clearly James' outfit yet he managed to fit it nicely onto Logan. Logan turned to Kendall.

"Hey, do I look princely?" Logan asked bashfully. Kendall nodded and stared at James' hands on Logan's collar. He was never one for jealousy but he wanted James all to himself tonight.

"Hell yeah man, you look royal as." His eyes didn't move from Jansen hands. James gave Logan's chest a pat before his hands moved to his hips.

"We'll have to style your hair as well," James stated. "Just slicking it back will look hot as though," James smirked. Kendall felt uncharacteristically jealous. He wants James to dress and compliment him. Kendall tried to shrug his thoughts off.

"So, we have the crib to ourselves. I was thinking we rent out a movie or something," Kendall suggested to James. Carlos pokes his head through the door and whined.

"Man, I wanna stay and watch movies too…" he was dressed as a wood elf.

"But you gotta help Logan get laid," Kendall quickly reasoned. He didn't want Carlos to back out and ruin his night alone with James.

"Yeah man you promised…" Logan frowned. Carlos sighed heavily. "Okay, but I wanna watch the movie you rent when I get back," Carlos stated sternly before leaving the room. Logan quickly checked the time on his phone before grunting.

"Time to go. Thanks James," Logan smiled and gave James' arm an affectionate pat. He said his goodbyes and left the room. There was a lot of fussing around outside the bedroom; it sounded like Logan was trying to organise something Carlos was doing and was getting frustrated. Soon enough, the front door slammed shut and silence filled the apartment. Kendall looked at James before going to the loungeroom to make sure the crib was clear. He nodded and turned around to tell James the news.

He didn't have to look far for James because he appeared out of what felt like nowhere. James grabbed Kendall and pressed a firm kiss to Kendall's lips. He instantly started to go for a make-out. Kendall put his hands on James' chest and pushed him back. James frowned and stared at Kendall sadly.

"Why don't you want to kiss? We have the house to ourselves…" James said sadly. Kendall smirked and grabbed a hold of the collar of James' shirt.

"You're not in control this time. I am." Kendall said sternly before pushing James onto the couch. James huffed and stared at Kendall in a gaze. "Do you submit?" Kendall's voice was deep and sultry. James gulped and nodded.

"Yes."


	4. Chapter Four - Settled

The sheets beneath James were crisp and freshly cleaned. The top sheet had been folded and moved to the floor. James' head rested on Kendall's pillow. He was laying naked with his hands covering his genitals. The room was silent while he waited for Kendall to come back in.

Kendall felt nervous, but he knew his envy would subside if he was able to top James. He had a quick drink of water and mentally prepared himself before he returned to his bedroom. The room was cool, the lamps next to Kendall and Logan's bed's giving off warm, dim lighting. Kendall walked into the room; he was also naked. He stood next to the bed and pulled a bottle of anal silicone lubricant and condoms from the bedside tables top draw. He had hidden them under a book he hadn't read in years.

He looked down at James who was naked and very quiet. "Why aren't you talking?" Kendall asked with a frown.

"Just waiting to see what you meant by submitting," James said with a bashful smirk. Kendall couldn't help but to smile at James.

"I'm fucking you tonight." Kendall said as he moved to sit between James' legs on the bed. James sat up suddenly and shook his head.

"No- I fuck you, that's my role." His voice was stern and certain.

"Well it's no fair that you get to top all the time. Let me put it in you for once," Kendall whined.

"No."

"Why not?"

"Cause."

"Cause why?"

"Kendall I just don't want anything in my ass okay!" James yelled. Kendall sat back and put the lube and condom down.

"Yeah, I won't ask again if you'd just tell me why. Like, I want to have sex tonight, but my ass hurts man. We've done it way too much my asshole needs a break," Kendall frowned. "Plus I really want to know what it feels like to be inside you…"

Silence fell between them. It was one of those _really_ awkward silences again. The kind that made Kendall worried James would insult him and stop talking to him in general again. His brow puckered while he stared down at the bed. Kendall looked up when he felt James move.

_'__Oh no…' _Kendall thought. He knew this was it. He shouldn't have even tried. James was leaving.

However, he never left. James put a hand on Kendall's ankle and sighed.

"I'm… I'm scared," James admitted in a small voice. "It's probably going to hurt, and you seem to really enjoy being on the bottom, so I thought what we were doing was fine. I didn't realise you were unhappy with the way we do things."

"I'm not unhappy, I just want to try do it a bit differently," Kendall put his hand on top of James'. "Trust me, I'll be gentle." He smiled reassuringly. James hesitated before nodding.

"I trust you," James said before laying back down on the bed. Kendall nodded and shuffled forwards. He looked down and noticed one of James' hands were still covering his cock. Kendall huffed and smiled shyly.

"Move your hands so I can prepare you," Kendall had learnt that preparation was important through James. He didn't think it was really all that necessary when he had thought about homosexual gay sex before, but now he knows much better. He knows that if he doesn't do this no one is going to be having a fun time.

James's eyes followed Kendall's hands. Kendall reached down for the lube and picked it up. James moved his hand off his cock and huffed.

"What? Not even going to arouse me first?" James' voice was now cheeky. Kendall hesitated for a moment before nodding.

"Oh yeah, hang on," Kendall put his things beside James. He shuffled upwards and laid down on top of James. He didn't weigh much so it wasn't much of an issue for him to be resting on James. He held both sides of James' face and leaned in to give him a kiss. James closed his eyes and allowed himself to melt into the wonderful sensation of Kendall's lips. Kendall sighed against James' moving mouth. James wasn't sure how he should be kissing Kendall. He didn't know if he could take control of the kiss and start making out, or if Kendall was meant to be the one in control of that too. He didn't need to think about this for long though because Kendall's lips started moving more feverishly.

Their kiss heated up and Kendall's hands moved to the back of James' head. He massaged his fingers into James' scalp and begun playing with his hair. James shivered, and Kendall kissed him deeper. Kendall's hands then moved to James' shoulders and he held onto them while propping himself up a bit. The only thing touching James now was his lower body and his hands. Kendall leaned in so that he could begin sucking and biting into James' neck. James gasped and closed his eyes. James hadn't expected to feel such a sharp bite. Of course, he had been bitten before, but this felt a lot different to how it usually felt.

James could feel himself hardening the more Kendall's mouth teased his skin. Kendall bit and nibbled along James' shoulder. James' hips thrusted upwards and he released an unsteady moan. Kendall's smirk grew, and he bit down on the sweet spot where the neck and shoulder meet. James' jaw slackened while Kendall teased this area. He then stuck his tongue out and licked a line from there up to James' ear. James quivered and released a breathless moan. He cried out and thrust his hips upwards again. He closed his eyes and bit into his bottom lip.

Kendall then dug his teeth into the sensitive areas of James' neck. This made James gasp and cry out rather loudly. Kendall was surprised to hear such a loud, sexy moan come from James. He pulled back and stared down. James' face was flushed a hot red, his eyes were lidded, jaw was slack, and his neck was red and beginning to bruise. Kendall licked his lips then moved to the other side. He leaned down and licked at James' earlobe.

"I wish I knew you had a thing for being bitten earlier," Kendall gruffly said into James' ear. An intense shiver raced down James' body. His dick twitched and stood to full attention; precum gathering at the tip. Kendall huffed a sultry chuckle before he begun sucking hard on the other side of James' neck. He evened out the bites and hickeys before he moved his lips to the nape of James' neck. He begun leaving light kisses before biting down hard.

His swollen lips kissed their way down to James' nipple. He naturally moved forwards to lick at the light bud. James gasped at the feeling of Kendall's warm, wet tongue flick his nipple. He covered his mouth with both hands when Kendall's lips wrapped around his nipple. Kendall smiled while he licked and sucked at the nipple.

This started to drive James crazy.

He cried out pathetic moans into his hands while Kendall's tongue and lips continued to move. He pressed his hands hard against his mouth and tried to keep himself calm. Kendall moved his lips over to the other nipple and looked up at James.

"Don't hold your noises back. We're alone," Kendall reminded him as his hand moved up to James' chest. He used his index finger and his thumb to roll and play with James' nipple. He pulled and tugged and lavished in every sweet moan that was released from James' slutty mouth. Kendall's tongue swirled, and his teeth nibbled on the nipple opposite to the one his hand played with.

After a while Kendall pulled back and looked down at James. His chest was heaving, and he was moaning unevenly. Kendall licked his lips before he rolled his hips and moved back to sit between James' legs.

"Aroused yet?" He asked with a cheeky smirk. James shot Kendall a stern glare before pointing at his dick.

"I don't know Kendall, why don't you ask my dick?"

Kendall chuckled then picked up the lube. He opened the bottle and poured some over James' cock, and then over James' perineum and hole. James twitched and hissed.

"Ugh- that's cold," he complained. Kendall rolled his eyes and wrapped his hand around James' dick. He gave him some gentle stroked before his middle finger poked at James' rim.

"I'm going to put a finger in now. Are you sure you're okay with this?" Kendall asked. James hesitated, which made Kendall stop moving his hand. He then nodded.

"I trust you dude," James nodded. Kendall nodded back before he begun pressing his middle finger in. James tensed and closed his eyes. Kendall sighed and wiggled his finger.

"You need to relax, remember? Otherwise it's not going to go smoothly." Kendall warned. James nodded and breathed slowly to try and calm himself. Kendall felt James' muscles relax. He then pressed more of his finger in.

James was taking Kendall's fingers surprisingly well. Kendall managed to prepare him by working James' hole into comfortably fitting at least three fingers. Kendall pulled his fingers out of James. He had been watching James squirm and cry out and it was making his cock a little too desperate for relief. He sat up and looked down at James' body. James' hands were in his hair and everything about him looked ready for a good fuck.

Kendall pulled a condom over his cock then pulled James' legs up. He smiled down at him and shuffled closer. "Ready?" He asked. James nodded quickly and closed his eyes. Kendall enjoyed how silently, and obedient James was being.

Kendall then held onto his cock and lined it up with James' hole. He stared down at James perfect cock before he begun pushing himself in. James huffed and held his breath. Kendall put one of James' legs up on his shoulder and held onto it. The other hand pressed into the side of James' face. Kendall caressed James' cheek. He looked way too tense. Kendall didn't want James being uncomfortable to ruin the feeling of finally being inside him.

He stared into James' unsure, scared eyes. "Relax James, it'll be okay," Kendall's voice was smooth and reassuring. James nodded again. Kendall gave James a sweet, chaste kiss before pushing his hips forwards a little more. His cock pressed into James and it made James quiver and release an uneven cry. His breath faltered, and his back arched.

Kendall tried to keep himself calm. James' asshole felt warm and comforting. Kendall pressed deeper into James' hole and released another cry.

James was being stretched in ways he had never felt before. He grunted and looked up at Kendall. Kendall was sweating and moaning while he moved his hips. James felt physically uncomfortable but still enjoyed looking up at Kendall. He loved when Kendall rode him because he was able to feel him more and stare up at him. He figured this was kind of the same, except he was the one being fucked. Kendall's hips moved in a smooth, steady pace while he made love to James.

James' arms raised, and he wrapped them around Kendall's neck and shoulders to pull him closer. He now realised that even though he wasn't feeling too good with Kendall fucking him, having him close meant so much more. He held onto Kendall and it threw Kendall out of his rhythm for a moment. James moaned hotly, and it made Kendall speed up. He pressed deeper, feeling his and James' balls meet. He blushed and pressed messy kisses to James' shoulder.

Kendall felt hot and extremely horny. He was already so close, but he wanted James to feel good. James' hands ran down Kendall's body and it made Kendall shiver. He moaned deeply then broke out of James' hold. He grabbed a hold of James' cock and begun stroking it while he moved his hips upwards.

James' back arched, and he cried out louder than he had earlier. His moans were breathy, and full of uneven whines. James whined, and tears pooled in his eyes. Kendall's hot hand slicked its way up and down James' thick member while he penetrated his hole. Kendall's dick rubbed up against James' prostate, causing millions of nerves to send pleasured signals up and down James' body.

James panted and closed his eyes as he finally understood why all of this was a good feeling. Kendall fucked himself into James while stroking James' dick. They both moaned, their bodies connected like it had never been before.

The orgasm that Kendall had into the condom inside of James was one of the most intense he had ever felt in his life. Fucking James had set off every nerve and sense in his body. He felt weak and pleasured.

His lips felt dry and he knew he was desperate for a drink. His asshole, now that it had been cleaned from the lubricant, was throbbing and sore. The aches ran up his back and through his hips. Kendall re-entered the bedroom with two glasses of water. He sat down on the bed and handed a glass to James while he sipped his own.

James held the glass to his lips. He was laying down but had propped himself up for the drink. He was sore and needed a sleep. He sipped the drink and thought about how much they had fucked in that one night. He had lost count after the third or fourth round. Kendall took a final sip of his drink before putting the glass down.

"Did you enjoy it?" Kendall asked. James swallowed the rest of his water; his dry throat thankful for the drink.

"Yeah, it was actually pretty good… I don't think I'll be moving around much tomorrow though. Might pretend to be sick again," he huffed. Kendall sighed with relief.

"Good… look James… I, uh…" Kendall took a moment to collect his thoughts. "I really wanted to top you. It was really bugging me that you were the only one to do all the fucking…"

"So, you envied how good I fuck you?" James asked with a cheeky smirk. He put his glass down and stared at Kendall knowingly. Kendall blushed lightly and rolled his eyes; giving James a playful little shove.

"I suppose…" Kendall admitted with a shrug. "At least I didn't get all grumpy for envying an ugly dude's face."

"Hey!" James exclaimed with a deep blush. "That was just a temporary misunderstanding…" He said in awkward self-defence.

"Yeah, yeah okay, whatever James-I'm-so-perfect-Diamond," Kendall teased. He laid down next to James and sighed. He rested his head on James' shoulder. That brief spark of electricity that always passed through them still felt strong and intense. Kendall closed his eyes.

"So, when are you going to ask me out on an actual date?" Kendall said playfully. James snorted and rested his head on Kendall's head.

"Soon, I promise."

"Cool…" Kendall leaned up to give James a quick kiss. Whatever happened between them next, Kendall looked forwards to.

He held onto James and found satisfaction in this moment right now. Everything else to do with their relationship would eventually fall into place. But right now? He and James were happy. And that's all that mattered.

**[ A/N: So yeah, that was my fic for the Emotions Challenge. My emotion was Envy and I found it really difficult to think of a good plot and story for this particular emotion. I apologise if it got sloppy towards the end, I was running out of time to submit the story but I do hope you enjoyed~ ]**


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